expectations.

i feel like everyone just always expects me to do things for them. sometimes i just simply can't. like today, i just wanted to spend some alone time by myself for once but no, i'm stuck babysitting. what if i wanted to go watch the movie too? don't come to my door and ask me if i wanna come to the movies while you're dropping the baggage with me. i made plans tonight and i just hate how no one asks me anything. earlier today you tell me that you're dropping it off with someone else and no one even gives me a heads up to tell me that i'm stuck with this thing. i'm already in a fucking pissed off mood already.

what the fuck.

what the fuck, brookville hall?

okay, so i don't understand why girls that live on this floor that use the bathroom i go to are so fucking disgusting. i walked into all three stalls, and all three stalls were FILTHY. the first one i went into had freaking blood stains on the seat. EW. the second one i went into made me scream out "WTF" and i was so disgusted. i'd rather have seen someone's stool in there then bloody water. damn. that girl must have a fucking heavy period because that was DISGUSTING, probably the worst thing i've ever seen. the third stall i went into smelled like they missed the bowl when they peed. cmon! WE ARE NOT GUYS. unless of course it was a guy using it. but idk. this is just disgusting and im so sick of the lack of hygiene these girls have. wtf you're in college. learn how to do something you were taught to do since you were a toddler.

FLUSH THE FUCKING TOILET.

'tis the season.

thanksgiving is around the corner and there's so much i'm thankful for this year.. it's been a while since i've been thankful for anything. i mean, i wouldn't even be able to tell you what i was thankful for last year other than being grateful that i graduated out of high school and got into a good school. this year, i'm thankful for so much.

i'm thankful for God for letting me experience the pain i went through to learn from the mistakes i went through to get this far. the faith the He gave me to get through every day even when i thought "this is the end for me, i see nothing further in my life." the joy He let me experience through my friends and the things we did. and the protection He always gave me. He never failed to let me feel alone and scared when i was by myself. Thank You for always being there for me, even when i didn't believe You where there.

i'm thankful for my family. through the fights and struggles we go through daily, i'm glad that you're my family and we all know that we'll be a close family no matter what the problems are.

i'm thankful for the friends i've been able to keep back at home. even though i go to school, not so far away from home, my lack of effort to call you guys everyday never phased you guys. i'm just glad that after nine years of friendship, we're still friends. and for the friends that have been in my life for just a couple of months, i'm glad that we were able to get so close in such a short amount of time.

i'm thankful for the friends i've made at school. i can't complain that we all are so different in so many ways, hate each other, love each other, get annoyed, or whatever the case may be, we can always still be friends. we've created so many memories together that we can keep forever.

i'm thankful for the friends i've lost. seems weird that i'd be grateful to lose friends, but only because if it wasn't for you guys, i wouldn't have realized how fucked up you guys were. from being fake as fuck and hypocritical, i'm so HAPPY you all are not in my life anymore because i only enjoy life ten times more without you.

i'm thankful for my boyfriend; the one i love to hate and hate to love. you're the biggest goof i've ever met, and i've never been more happy. you're the only boyfriend that i've had thats so entirely different then the previous boyfriends. i couldn't be more happy to be with you even though i don't tell you this everyday. i'm glad that i randomly met you in my friends room while you used my textbook, bagged you on facebook and got your number (ooooh, like that don't you?) all on the same day. i think. but anyway, i'm a lot happier then i've been in a while and you're part of the reason. :)

i'm just thankful for those who are in my life, who made an impact.

happy thanksgiving everyone!

rekindling old memories.

a year ago sometime during this time, i broke down crying every tear out of my body trying to fight the feelings out of my heart with my mind from what i thought was making the right decision. today, i had the same thing happen to me again... not something i'm proud of you only because i hate to be seen as a weak person, unable to overcome something so.. i don't know.. i can't find the word to it right now, but all i can say is that what i'm going through isn't easy but i'm sure i'll over come it with time.

but i'm laying in bed listening to Gabe Bondoc while i'm texting a friend who've i guess i've told a lot too. then i flash back to what one of my best friends have told me before.. "don't give one person your all if all you get back in return is nothing.." seriously, i've tried to do that the first time around and i got hurt, second time, only put in half and i still got hurt.. and i've successfully done it this time, i didn't even give in that much and i still got hurt.. maybe that's just my personality or something, but i don't know. i'm not so sure about some things now.

i was also told in a letter once that a girls tears are very valuable and shouldn't be wasted on pitiful things like heartbreaks... that was from my first real boyfriend, the only person i ever genuinely learned to fall in love and i don't think i've ever loved anyone as much as i loved him. he's also the only one that i stayed friends with 'til this day because he was my first love, my first real best friend, my first everything and anything. he was a chapter in my life that caused so much joy and pain. but anyway, back on topic, what i'm trying to say is i haven't shed a tear for a boy since last year and... today. nothing too serious though.

hm, i hate how i never really think about blogs throughly and just start them and end them completely off topic. happens a lot. yikes. i'll end it with this. and yes, i re-activated my facebook account for my friend because she didn't want my facebook to disappear. ha.

xx,

erin crystal.

love has 28 definitions in the dictionary.

so i found this 'i love you' template on my phone. it made me think, if you're really going to tell someone you love, "i love you" for the first, second, even the thousandth time.. why do you need a template? don't the people at LG know better than to make that kind of template? lol.

instead, why not have the sincerity to type it out yourselves from the first letter to the last? Do you really need a template for that?

the human race confuses me sometimes.. ha.

then again, typing it out is so much faster rather than going to 'insert'.. scrolling down to 'templates' scrolling down to 'i love you' lol.

oh another thing i can't stand right now is how boys freak out when you even mention the word "love". relax my friend. love can be used as a noun to show affection or appreciation to another person, place or thing. it can also be used as a verb to show a "profound tender, passionate affection" [dictionary.com] for an object. so.. yeah, relax. don't jump

to conclusions and psych yourself out. just makes the situation even more worse and awkward, lol.

xx,

erincrystal.

first impressions.

first impressions are often said the one's that count the most. but what if the first impression is a false impression?

when one thinks about meeting a new person, things run through their minds like how the river flows into the ocean. so many things go through one's mind like, "i need to make a good impression", "i hope i made an impact" or, "i hope s/he'll call." first impressions are to leave a good impression after you meet them and for you to think "hey, this person is pretty cool." and so you'll end up being friends with the individual, or "hey, this guy might be our next employee!" but have you also ever thought about how you don't really know one person, until you've actually talked to them for a while or get to know them a bit more then the ten minutes you first meet them? after that... all those layers of protection they use to hide their real identities, real personas, begin to deteriorate. sooner or later, the real person behind all those layers reveal and you either end up hating or liking the person.

when they say, "first impression is the best impression" think about it... it isn't always the best impression one can leave. during the time you meet a person for the first time, you too, are nervous... might say the wrong things and do something stupid that you wish to take back. or you can come off as a strong person but on the inside, you're far from that.

only time can really promise you a good impression on individuals. just meeting a person that one time can't let you cloud your judgement. but of course... there are always exceptions. :)

copy and paste.

To every guy that's said, "Sex can wait"
To every guy that's said, "You're beautiful."
To every guy that was never too busy to drive across town to see her.
To every guy that gives her flowers and a card when she is sick or down.
To every guy who has given her flowers just because that's how he rolls.
To every guy that said he would die for her.
To every guy that really would.
To every guy that did what she wanted to do.
To every guy that cried in front of her. ....
To every guy that she cried in front of...
To every guy that holds hands with her.
To every guy that kisses her with meaning.
To every guy that hugs her when she's sad.
To every guy that hugs her for no reason at all.
To every guy who would give their jacket up for her.
To every guy that calls to make sure she got home safe.
To every guy that would wait for her for hours just to see her for 10 minutes...
To every guy that would give his seat up...
To every guy that just wants to cuddle.
To every guy that reassured her that she was beautiful no matter what.
To every guy who told his secrets to her.
To every guy that tried to show how much he cared through every word and breath.
To every guy that thought maybe this could be the one.
To every guy that believed in her dreams.
To every guy that would have done anything so she could achieve them.
To every guy that never laughed at her when she told him her dreams.
To every guy that walked her to her car and opened the door.
To every guy that gave his heart.
To every guy who prays that she is happy even if you are not with her.
Not many girls appreciate nice guys anymore...And because of this, there are not many left out there...

I guarantee 90% of the men on your profile will not re-post this because they care more about their image

If you are a nice guy re-post this with:"This is how every girl should be treated."
If you are a girl that thinks every guy should treat a girl this way re-post this with: "To Every Guy"

so i copied and pasted this from a note on facebook and man, it's so true. every girl does want to be treated that way.. anywho, enjoy!

xx,

erincrystal.